Preparing to Be a Working Mom

I returned to work after 6 weeks of maternity leave. You know how one minute on the treadmill feels like five? Well, a week of maternity leave feels like only a fleeting moment. I knew, even when I first got pregnant, that I would be returning to work full time. I wasn’t sad about it. The truth is I really enjoy working and, candidly, I don’t believe I am tough enough to be a full time stay-at-home mom. However, as my 6 weeks came closer and closer to an end, I realized that I was totally unprepared to go back to work and take care of newborn baby. I felt myself scrambling in the last few weeks to get ready, and it was stressful! Here’s my advice on getting ready to be a working mom:

Figure out care options early.

I made the mistake of waiting until my baby was born to start looking at daycares. Big mistake. Every daycare I looked at seemed to have a long waiting list. Luckily, I found one that was able to take my baby at the end of my 6 weeks. It’s a great daycare, but it was also my only option. I think deep down I was holding on to hope that a family member would move nearby and be able to watch her. We also didn’t plan very well financially for a daycare. The cost of daycare where we live is similar to paying the rent of a one bedroom apartment per month. If I had started looking into daycares sooner, we could have made room in our budget for tuition.

Document your baby.

In the weeks leading up to my return to work, I started noticing and documenting my baby’s routine and quirks. This was really helpful information to provide to the daycare. Every child is different, and no one will know your child like you do. I documented her sleep patterns, eating patterns, moods and how to fix them, and her milestones thus far. In the first few weeks of your baby’s life you’ll be frustrated because you are trying to learn how to read your baby. You can save the care provider that same frustration by providing this information and make the transition easier for your little bundle of joy.

I also documented what I was bringing to daycare everyday – diapers, clothes, wipes, food, etc. It’s good to have a record of these things so you know when to restock and you don’t lose anything.

Outline a morning routine.

Mornings are crazy. Especially when you’ve probably gone weeks without a full night sleep. I made a checklist of everything that needed to happen in the morning before it was time for us to leave. I put that checklist up on our bathroom mirror where my husband would be sure to see it and know what to help with. Outline everything – not just things pertaining to your baby. For us, this included things like “eat breakfast” or “take out the dogs”. Knowing what needs to be done can also help you identify where you can save time. For instance, there are a lot of things that can be done the night before like packing the diaper bag, picking out clothes for you and your baby, washing your hair, etc. I also looked for ways that I could combine certain to-dos like pumping (I exclusively pump) and putting on makeup. The more time you can save in the morning, the more sleep you can get!

Recruit your spouse.

Your spouse can be a huge help in the mornings and you should be able to share the responsibilities of the morning routine. Communicate with your spouse and decide who is doing what. If your baby is bottle fed, recruit him for night time feedings so that each of you can get somewhat decent sleep. It’s all about teamwork!

Sort things out with your employer ahead of time.

Your employer will be grateful. Make sure that you tie up all loose ends before your leave. Decide who will be covering what in your absence so that no balls are dropped. Document any projects, accounts, etc that you have your hands in so that there’s no gap in communication. If you’re interested, talk to your employer about any work from home options ahead of time. Do not inquire about work from home options while on maternity leave. You may feel like this gives you more leverage, but it doesn’t. You’ll also want to create a plan for when you get back. Decide what things will take priority for when you get back. If you are breastfeeding, you’ll want to coordinate and make sure you have a place to pump.

Get prepared mentally.

This one can be tough, but in the last two weeks of your leave, try to mentally prepare yourself to come back to work. Come to grips with the fact that you’ll be leaving your baby with someone else. Try to think of all the positive things that will come from you working full time.

For me, these are the things I focused on:

More money – for a comfier life, traveling, ballet classes, soccer leagues, piano lessons, or really anything else that you may want your child to experience.
Quality time over quantity of time – I cherish every second I spend with my baby now that it’s limited. I spend less time looking at my phone when I’m with her and more time playing peek-a-boo and soaking in her little smiles.
Adult conversations – Not every conversation you have needs to be about your baby’s bodily functions. I enjoy my relationships with my co-workers and I like the conversations I have with them.
Conquering your goals – You are a mom now and sometimes you may feel like that word has stolen your identity. The truth is, you were a woman before you became a mom and you still have goals and aspirations. Sure, your time and energy and purpose will mostly revolve around your little one, but don’t feel guilty for having goals and dreams outside of raising a perfect child. I believe that conquering your own dreams will improve your overall happiness and make it easier for you to be a more loving mom.
Friends and socialization – My baby is still tiny, but being in daycare is going to give her the chance to make friends, learn how to communicate, and socialize.

Remember – all mothers are great. Whether you work or stay-at-home, you are working to mold a child into a contributing member of society and a self actualized human being. If you do plan to work, I hope these insights will help you to be more prepared for when you return to work.